Gullible Handyman
Posted at: 2009-06-21 13:37:13
Original ad:
DO NOT WORK FOR JIMMY ******, IGNORE HIS "LOOKING FOR A HANDYMAN" AD BELOW. IT IS A SCAM!! I WORKED FOR HIM FOR A WEEK AND HE SAID HE WOULD PAY ME AT THE END OF THE WEEK, AND THEN AT THE END OF THE WEEK HE SAID THAT I WAS PAID BI-WEEKLY AND WOULD HAVE TO WAIT UNTIL NEXT FRIDAY, SO THAT FRIDAY CAME AND HE NEVER PAID! HES BEEN DODGING MY CALLS! AVOID HIM AT ALL COSTS HE WILL SCREW YOU OUT OF TWO WEEKS PAY
From Mike Anderson to **********@*********.org
Hey, I saw your ad about Jimmy ****** and must say you sound like a very gullible person. Why didn't you think something was up the first time he didn't pay you? It sounds like you are just not capable of thinking like an intelligent person. If you want, I will follow you around and give you advice to help you not make such stupid decisions. My fee is $15/hr, but it is well worth it.
Mike
From ********@gmail.com to Me
FUCK YOU UR AN IDIOT I DONT NEED YOU TO FOLLOW ME AROUND ASSHOLE
From Mike Anderson to ********@gmail.com
I don't think you understand how much money my advice could be saving you. For example, did you know that if a Nigerian asks for your social security number, he is not just getting to know you? He actually wants it to steal your identity. I am full of useful advice like this. Please reconsider.
Mike
From ********@gmail.com to Me
I KNOW THAT DICK HEAD. SHUT THE FUCK UP
From Mike Anderson to ********@gmail.com
Okay, it sounds like you don't want my advice.
I am interested in your handyman skills, however. How would you like to do the siding and roofing on my house? The job will probably take about two weeks. Don't worry, though, I'll pay you at the end of the two weeks, you just do the work first. And could you buy the shingles and siding? I'll reimburse you for those supplies as well at the end of the two weeks.
Mike
From ********@gmail.com to Me
FUCK OFF COCK SUCKER
Comments:
Chaitra (2015-11-29 22:22:24)
That's really shrwde! Good to see the logic set out so well.
jackpot17 (2015-04-02 13:09:11)
интернет казино рулетка кристалл казино xo, а также онлайн покер играть бесплатно.
slot46 (2015-04-02 05:52:35)
онлайн казино играть бесплатно шарики, лучшие казино мира.
Barack Obama (2015-02-25 13:16:05)
Thanks for the laughs, Mike!
- Barack Obama
anonymous (2015-01-11 22:12:43)
I have small balls.
Jay (2014-01-23 02:28:22)
Lol, Mike, you are such a dick.
Shark (2013-07-12 15:06:28)
Well, he does have a point
Ab (2013-06-11 08:29:34)
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! This guy is a frickin legend.
@america (2013-01-09 19:31:33)
Wow you are seriously delusional.
Oddball (2012-12-24 20:56:43)
@alex = easily pleased. He probably soils himself at 'knock knock' jokes
alex (2012-11-16 03:41:52)
rofllll "For example, did you know that if a Nigerian asks for your social security number, he is not just getting to know you? " Absolutely hysterical!@#
@america, et al (2012-11-10 14:56:52)
Do you mean "...on USA the GREASED country"... right?
I'm PERDY sure that's WHUT you MENT.
america (2012-11-08 19:06:29)
Lets be realistic, America is the greatest country in the world. There is NO reason to be discusing this with anyone who is most likely another moron on an internet website from who knows where, hating his life and taking it out on USA the GREAST country.
CAPS LOCK (2012-09-09 22:54:51)
CAPS LOCK CAPS LOCK CAPS LOCK CAPS LOCK CAPS LOCK CAPS LOCK CAPS LOCK CAPS LOCK CAPS LOCK CAPS LOCK CAPS LOCK CAPS LOCK
Really? (2012-07-29 12:48:38)
Ok I live in America and I do not think that it or any other country is the best. The American society is not brainwashed, not by far, most people spend their day complaining about it. Only ignorant people would go around spouting crap like that.
elephant (2012-07-29 01:54:01)
looks like he doesn't know how to turn off caps lock
asdasdasd (2012-07-20 00:14:48)
There is no country that is the greatest. Stfu already.
USA has many good things inside it, but there are many bad things too. I wouldnt ever claim that its the best. Only ignorant retards can call their country the best.
@'MERICA fromBrookly (2012-07-18 22:48:00)
"Lets be realistic,America is the greatest country in the world."
Seriously? You're just showing how brainwashed is the american society...
@@Mericafrombrooklyn (2012-07-17 01:55:08)
I love how you are getting trolled so hard.
@MERICA fromBrooklyn (2012-07-14 04:33:17)
"USA the GREAST country"
GREAST? WTF does that even mean? Is it an acronym? Or do you mean "greased", obviously referring to the USA's soaring obesity rates. Either way, you have merely confirmed that USA really is the most stupid cou
'MERICA fromBrooklyn (2012-07-02 10:11:40)
Lets be realistic, America is the greatest country in the world. There is NO reason to be discusing this with anyone who is most likely another moron on an internet website from who knows where, hating his life and taking it out on USA the GREAST country.
,MERIX (2012-07-02 10:10:58)
Lets be realistic, America is the greatest country in the world. There is NO reason to be discusing this with anyone who is most likely another moron on an internet website from who knows where, hating his life and taking it out on USA the GREAST country.
G Ice, niggahhhzzzz (2012-07-01 08:48:26)
ay yo niggaz its g ice bitch. you all r dumb n fak u. ICE COLD NIGGAAAAAAAAZZZZ
Sean (2012-06-28 21:44:49)
Only Americans have the distinct privilege of criticizing the United States. The rest of the world needs to be grateful for the US securing your freedom.
What the fuck (2012-06-27 18:26:09)
*like a ten year old girl
What (2012-06-27 18:25:31)
the fuck? Why is everyone in the comments section bickering like ten year old girl? Are you all retarded or something? It doesn't what country you came from or whether you're black or white or whatever. Anyone can be mean or retarded.
That's just (2012-06-22 13:03:54)
retarded. The guy below me spelt racism wrong.
what a fucktard, lmao
againstracsism (2012-06-13 21:34:08)
@ni**** stink, you are a fuckhead cocksucking dipshit cuntass dike slut whore taint who is so faggedy. fagatron. suck it. im white...bitch
hoho (2012-05-09 07:22:25)
salt peanuts
8^P (2012-05-03 14:58:54)
funny all "caps" rager...
Fan (2012-04-27 14:43:53)
lol :-)
Fan (2012-04-27 14:43:30)
Doesn't everyone know that Friday is payday and Friday is always the payroll clerks day off?
America is the best (2012-03-10 11:36:29)
FUCK ALL OF YOU
Ian (2012-02-23 05:04:07)
Why bring race, country or anything into it?! Morons the lot of you
Niggers Stink (2012-01-14 21:32:37)
Fuck the blacks
CAPS LOCK (2012-01-14 18:46:29)
Every single word the victim typed was capitalized. EVERY SINGLE ONE!!!
Seriously (2011-12-11 23:19:49)
I honestly don't understand why all these "my country is better than yours" arguments always erupt in these comments sections. Quit acting like children.
josh (2011-12-11 18:05:02)
this is fucking hilarious!
anonymous (2011-11-11 02:47:06)
When you've been kicking ass and taking names since 1776 people gonna hate.
Mao ZeDong (2011-11-06 02:22:12)
I find dis insulting.
the truth (2011-09-16 15:26:49)
you're an idiot.
the truth (2011-08-30 12:53:21)
just like the u.s. attacks other countries to steal their oil. You are all little bitches who would no survive one day in another country
Hello. (2011-08-24 20:11:59)
@The Nigerian Pitier
Uhmmm South Africa.
Egypt...
You should go to school or something.
@Fuck You (2011-08-20 10:49:55)
...says the guy who is talking shit.
Fuck you @anonymous (2011-08-11 17:49:04)
U guys are all cocksuckers straight up. I dont know why Americans are such assholes.
anonymous (2011-07-11 10:32:37)
@ feedback there is already a guy on the Internet who does just that. And when he fucks with them he goes hard
anonymous (2011-06-01 15:14:29)
30 million WEALTHY Nigerians? Yeah right. Nigeria per capita income = $2,422. Your definition of "wealthy" must be very loose.
Ignoramus pitier? (2011-05-29 06:42:09)
Theres 30million or so wealthy NIGERIANS, and I mean WEALTHY, so how'd you figure they are poor? Richest Nigerian is worth over 13 billion dollars, and we have a dozen Nigerians in the billions of dollars, wanna keep generalising?
The Nigerian Pitier? (2011-05-20 21:34:41)
Fuck the nigerians. if theyre poor, theyre poor, and nobody else will give a shit. Same goes for the rest of Africa, cept for...uhh...nowhere.
The Nigerian Pitier? (2011-05-20 21:34:07)
Fuck the nigerians. if theyre poor, theyre poor, and nobody else will give a shit. Same goes for the rest of Africa, cept for...uhh...nowhere.
Travis (2011-04-22 21:38:14)
if i was the guy who got scammed and some guy didnt want to pay me after 2 weeks of work, i would go back to his house and rip the shingles and siding off of his house
CEEBADA (2011-04-22 15:24:56)
HAHAHAHHAHAHA HA I CAN"T BREATHE HAHAHAHA
Lord (2011-04-01 22:03:35)
@Anon
BUT YOU STILL HAVE TO STEER
Anon (2011-03-29 14:55:52)
CAPS LOCK IS CRUISE CONTROL FOR COOL
@Cris Okoye (2011-03-28 19:47:51)
i hope you're a nigerian in your next life so you would go to prison and get butt fucked so hard you vomit shit, dick sucking asshole cunt
@Prince Abasiama (2011-03-28 19:44:55)
hahahahahahahahaha
Drew (2011-03-25 14:45:40)
Ok first lesson accomplished, that'll be $15.
lol guy (2011-02-09 20:46:59)
sam gado was a runnig back for the packers then went to the texans who knows after that (he did go to med school)
Feedback (2011-01-23 23:21:28)
why don't you start fucking with nigerian scammers? that would be awesome.
Bhoa (2011-01-22 22:41:21)
No. Not all nigerians are scammers.
Just the ones that ask you for your social security number. Don't worry. We feel the same way about Egyptians, Puerto Ricans, Germans, and Australians who ask as well.
Prince Abasiama (2010-12-17 17:15:09)
Alright gentlemen. I know my fellow Nigerians have been scamming you guys out of a lot of money, and I am here to make it up. I am willing to reimburse you $90,000,000. I just need $10,000 upfront for the legal fees and then the money is yours.
Dave Duke (2010-12-15 10:43:56)
Why don't all you Nigerians quit whining?
Sam Gado (2010-12-15 10:41:33)
Chris, I do not appreciate your generalizations about Nigerians. I have worked hard to come to America and go to Med school. I have never done anything dishonest in my life. People in Nigeria mean no harm, they are simply desperate!
Cris Okoye (2010-12-15 10:39:20)
Nigerians suck donkey balls, they have groups of scammers that spend all waking hours trying to rob and scam hard working us citizens of their valuable belongings. Every one should be placed in federal prison and anal raped, just to be sure!
internet scammer (2010-12-12 10:12:54)
@nigeria well, you shouldn't be so hasty with your conclusions. Yes, US has problems, but these INTERNAL problems are kept within the country. we don't send out tons of emails and drugs OUTSIDE the country that essentially affects ppl unrelated to
nigeria (2010-12-10 11:57:07)
i have a bloody cunt
Jay (2010-12-08 05:43:02)
@nigerian, for every drug dealer we have, your country has 1000 dealers and 1900 scammers, if not more, and far worse political and 'standard-of-living' issues. If you can't handle reality, well.....no one can help you there.
anonymous (2010-12-07 12:14:23)
@Nigeria you are so fucking stupid, he was offering "advice" you obviously have no fucking sense of humor, if you are so sensitive you shouldn't even be on this page.
nigeria (2010-12-02 12:49:12)
Not all nigerians re scammers. in the usa u hav drug dealers and murderers on d rampage solve ur problems b4 u mention other countries bloody cunt fool #okbye
Mark V Shaney (2010-10-28 22:06:53)
Original ad: DO NOT WORK FOR A SCAM!! I DONT NEED YOU TO WAIT UNTIL NEXT FRIDAY, SO THAT FRIDAY CAME AND WOULD HAVE TO WAIT UNTIL NEXT FRIDAY, SO THAT I WAS PAID BI-WEEKLY AND HE NEVER PAID! HES BEEN DODGING MY CALLS! AVOID HIM AT THE END OF THE END OF TW
Freak (2010-08-13 13:29:47)
And thats why yellow makes me sad
funny101 (2010-08-13 11:27:18)
THATS HILARIOUS
RETARD (2010-08-09 04:42:05)
IF I CANT FIGR OUT HOW 2 TRN OF CAPS LOCK OR SPELL, IT MEANS IM SMARTER THAN U AND UR OPININ IS NOT AS IMPRTANT!!!!!!!!!
1 (2010-06-28 12:49:16)
one of the best ones yet
fuck maddox (2010-06-24 19:29:04)
Maddox sucks horse dick in his mothers basement.
Fahim (2010-06-22 02:04:17)
Can you imagine how the handyman must've felt being first of all cheated out of his money AND then being taunted like this? LOL!!!!
Greg (2010-06-11 13:10:10)
Two weeks LMAO
Name (2010-05-05 01:23:38)
"For example, did you know that if a Nigerian asks for your social security number, he is not just getting to know you? He actually wants it to steal your identity." Lol, best part.
Ronbelluso (2010-04-28 22:14:26)
You are a master writer and comedian! These emails are hilarious
Yoshimano (2010-04-27 08:16:58)
Another great moment of covered laughs at work. Thank you so much
9-o-simone is retard (2010-04-18 00:45:50)
Lol read wtf she or he says he must be infected with downsyndrome
Ryan (2010-03-05 22:18:31)
LMAO 'll pay you at the end of the two weeks, you just do the work first. HAHAHAHAHA
Jillian (2010-02-17 20:41:50)
My new favorite site.
9-o-simone (2010-02-14 08:37:13)
yeah dare 2 stop that ever ! where 2 laugh bout these days ? lame youtube-BS ? - hope with the faithbooth-group u havent warned all them "gullible" victims
GrayFOX (2010-02-13 07:54:24)
Maddox is still awesome and always will be.
mysterymeat3 (2010-02-05 15:14:44)
Does this writing remind anyone else of Maddox (before he was shitty)? Anyway, nice job, this site is hilarious, I'm surprised nobody has tried to do this just to get put on this site yet.
789 (2010-01-07 15:06:40)
Original ad:
DO NOT WORK FOR JIMMY ******, IGNORE HIS "LOOKING FOR A HANDYMAN" AD BELOW. IT IS A SCAM!! I WORKED FOR HIM FOR A WEEK AND HE SAID HE WOULD PAY ME AT THE END OF THE WEEK, AND THEN AT THE END OF THE WEEK HE SAID THAT I WAS PAID BI-WE
Julie (2010-01-06 19:06:22)
You are a fucking genius!
pat (2010-01-05 21:48:40)
"did you know that if a Nigerian asks for your social security number, he is not just getting to know you? He actually wants it to steal your identity. I am full of useful advice like this. Please reconsider."
please reconsider ahahah
HAHA (2010-01-03 21:41:23)
"anonymous (2009-12-25 13:21:51)
Grate work mate.How cum this isn't top rated? Its too good!"
watched too many pornos have you? XD
spe (2009-12-26 16:27:45)
To below comment: Cum is top rated, thats why there are so many uneducated people in the world... Duh.
anonymous (2009-12-25 13:21:51)
Grate work mate.How cum this isn't top rated? Its too good!
Zachary! (2009-12-24 01:47:37)
I don't even care if it's fake; shit is funny.
Z Butt Whale (2009-12-03 20:34:22)
I am so happy someone sent me this site -- I am pissing myself. Whoever you are, author, you are damned funny. Keep up the good work.
candice (2009-12-02 20:51:04)
I LOVE this site.
mimi (2009-12-01 16:50:22)
lol. love how this site makes me laugh.
chrissaw (2009-11-30 18:20:59)
I have read all of the emails on the page when will there be more this is the best site ever.
HOUSE (2009-11-30 15:29:42)
@stevether, @AlexTorry - I am not gay and I found this to be very funny
Lee Lee (2009-11-26 19:37:29)
that was full of awesomeness
girlfran' (2009-11-23 16:11:26)
I ONLY SPEAK IN CAPS. RAWWR!
stevether (2009-11-16 02:36:05)
@AlexTorry Thanks for letting us know your sexual preference?
anonymous (2009-11-15 00:15:53)
LOLOLOL
AlexTorry (2009-11-02 17:29:30)
I am gay and I thought this was great!
Mike2 (2009-10-27 16:39:10)
HOLY SHIT, THIS HANDIMAN DOESN'T EVEN REALIZE HIS CAPS LOCK BUTTON IS ON!!!!! SOMEONE SHOULD TELL HIM THAT IT'S ON. HAHAHA
Rminduh (2009-10-22 01:53:24)
Me, you don't sound very happy. I mean he was only trying to give this man helpful advice
I mean the poor bastard sounds like a simple bumpkin
JuiCe (2009-10-19 03:46:36)
I am interested in your handyman skills, however.
Hahah OMG.. That made me laugh!
Bret (2009-10-16 01:51:59)
Holy shit that's some funny stuff
DzNuttz413U$oMoB (2009-10-15 23:00:58)
Whereda fux is the voting or rating button4 this site???
Cocksucker needed (2009-10-13 16:01:12)
yes, yes we would want one
Cosmio (2009-10-10 16:57:56)
Why is a cock sucker a bad thing? Wouldn't every cock owner want one?
Jeremy (2009-10-10 01:57:00)
super pwned
Earl (2009-10-09 16:22:50)
YES! This is the best website ever!
me (2009-10-07 18:38:44)
i want to punch that mike anderson guy in this face just reading this. what a annoying turd
anonymous (2009-10-04 21:02:29)
THEN WHO WAS JIMMY ?
mrs.bungle (2009-09-21 22:25:04)
best one I've read so far.
omg (2009-09-17 19:22:19)
hahahahahahhahahahahhahaha
Sham (2009-09-15 23:36:25)
Hil-fucking-larious!!!!
tonbai (2009-09-15 03:46:04)
haha! :) nice!!!
Major Payne (2009-09-05 01:48:15)
That shits hilarious.
Elvis (2009-09-04 17:08:29)
this one is tight yo
Robin (2009-09-01 18:19:50)
This one is my fave thus far. Awesome! You are hilarious!
anonymous (2009-09-01 16:31:16)
haha wow that guy has serious caps issues
emma (2009-08-31 08:50:04)
lmao u so cool
sherry.lavone (2009-08-26 16:33:06)
my favorite one by far
jonas brothers (2009-08-25 02:55:03)
BALLS ASS!
Dan (2009-08-06 08:48:21)
Duncan is funny because he pisses off uptight douchebags.
duncan fan (2009-08-04 17:57:47)
You nailed it, man! Thanks!
robot legs (2009-08-04 02:55:18)
ha
anonymous (2009-08-04 01:41:55)
your comment is funny because you say why the emails are funny
Duncan (2009-08-03 17:45:20)
This is funny because he first says he stupid and then try to scam him like he was scammed earlier on at his old handyman job!
unmotivated (2009-07-30 17:32:17)
omg ur a genius made my day at work hahaha
Dave (2009-07-28 20:01:14)
@LLCOOLJ
Why was your anus facing the keyboard???
LLCOOLJ (2009-07-28 18:07:34)
I laughed so hard that my anus exploded over the keyboard. peace y'all
pat (2009-07-27 04:38:01)
another gem haha keep it up
Dick Douche (2009-07-26 02:35:02)
My Kitten Needs Tampons, it is on its "." what do?
Need a Douche? go fucking buy one!
LMFAO (2009-07-25 18:47:03)
I just laughed so hard both of my testicles ruptured at the same time.
I like dick! (2009-07-23 03:24:45)
I wana jump on a carrot!
Someone (2009-07-22 15:53:00)
I can't help thinking that the guy who worked for Jimmy is actually one of the many commenters on this site. The sophisticated vocabulary is unmistakeable. (Hehe, I sure fucked that one up the first time)
Someone (2009-07-22 15:51:44)
I can't help thinking that "Jimmy" is actually one of the many commenters on this site. The sophisticated vocabulary is unmistakeable.
Danny (2009-07-22 15:20:50)
Duncan / Joni, are you two 10 years old or less. That could be the only excuse for having made such a useless comment. You are ruining things for everyone else.
J (2009-07-16 05:29:38)
hilarious!!!!!!!!!!
Andrew (2009-07-15 18:33:05)
Tip #1: See the button on your keyboard that says "Caps Lock"? Press it.
Tim Morrison (2009-07-15 16:16:04)
anonymous...I HATE YOU.
LOL just look at all the posts anonymous has made. Tell him to go get a life.
Me (2009-07-15 11:34:39)
Omg hilarious!!!
angry (2009-07-15 01:09:00)
angry handymen are bad lol
CarolinaKooiman (2009-07-13 16:12:15)
Apparently, the gullible handyman's keyboard is stuck in CAPS. I didn't see a single lower case letter.
Joni (2009-07-13 03:01:09)
I'm sorry about my previous comment. Duncan is my second cousin. He was visiting and telling me what to type. I'm actually very smart.
Natz (2009-07-12 21:11:46)
Duncan is trying to sound like he wears a helmet, and those of you who don't get that don't have a sense of humor so I don't know why you're on here.
wow rofl (2009-07-12 14:37:14)
duncan probably sleeps with a helment..
anonymous (2009-07-12 00:35:07)
Ya Duncan is gay like he's not funny
Lol (2009-07-10 17:04:50)
Good one!!
Nick (2009-07-10 13:37:37)
I think this one is my favorite! Absolutely FANTASTIC!! The CAPS mean that I am very SERIOUS!
Xander (2009-07-09 20:59:33)
Who's failing?
Fail (2009-07-09 17:08:27)
Duncan-- your commend is just about as funny as the post. Please do not procreate.
? (2009-07-09 15:06:02)
really duncan? you're a genius!!
Mak (2009-07-07 22:58:09)
Holy crap, I'm pooing while reading this (god bless the wifi) and every explosion of laughter makes me shit better and better. Srsly, this is better than bran.
Chris (2009-07-07 04:38:21)
Fuck off cock sucker.
Malaktose (2009-07-07 00:05:52)
Priceless, this site is a gem
OMFG (2009-07-04 17:09:28)
That was priceless. Laughed my ass off especially the last request.
OMFH (2009-07-04 17:08:56)
That wad priceless. Laughed my ass off especially the last request.
Rinker (2009-06-30 23:53:01)
No, CAPS LOCK is just lazy
Schmuckface (2009-06-30 14:58:13)
Love it. This made me laugh audibly, and I never lie about that.
anonymous (2009-06-30 12:06:46)
CAPS LOCK IS CRUISE CONTROL FOR COOL!
Dm (2009-06-29 15:37:32)
Hahahahah...this made my monday soo much brighter!!
John (2009-06-29 12:59:37)
Hahah good one
An (2009-06-29 01:33:22)
I'm surprised this one didn't get a lot of comments. I think it's very funny and witty.
DC (2009-06-27 00:39:53)
bravo
Alicia (2009-06-26 00:18:19)
fuckin amazing stuff. keeep em comin!!! thanks
Me (2009-06-24 14:45:55)
I think his Caps Lock button was working badly.
hahaha (2009-06-24 05:52:54)
I like how his replies are all in capital letters like he is really expressing just how FUCKING PISSED OFF HE IS hahahaha. Great work!
Fran (2009-06-23 20:07:05)
LOL! Priceless shit.
man (2009-06-22 13:00:10)
this one is great, clever and funny. keep it coming, good luck.
evilbitxx (2009-06-22 11:54:53)
saved my monday =)
frito (2009-06-22 10:13:44)
the last request was priceless this shit is awesome
G-dogg (2009-06-22 06:31:26)
sounds like he owes mike at least 50 bucks for the consultation. it almost appears that he learned a lesson.
xenon (2009-06-21 20:07:20)
LOL, love it. This place needs a voting system
anonymous (2009-06-21 15:26:50)
hahahahaha
Joni (2009-06-21 14:55:30)
Ahahaha. He won't take the risk of not being paid twice :D
Taylor (2009-06-21 14:27:38)
LOLOL
RD33 (2009-06-21 14:03:24)
This guy is great. Keep it coming.
LLmayne (2009-06-21 13:58:09)
oh my god dude this one is so damned funny
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